I get asked a lot..."Why can’t I motivate myself to reach my goals? I've written them down - I review them daily... But I just can't take action!"
Honestly, the answer might surprise you… It actually isn’t entirely your fault!
The inertia problem actually lies in between intention and action. In a little place we all spend a bit too much time... "the comfort zone."
An intention is easy, because, in this world, there is no shortage of information - you do a Google search, find what someone else did, modify a little, write it down and everything should magically happen...right?
What do you mean, wrong? That is what everyone since the beginning of time has said about goal setting; "write it down and you shall have it..."
What they didn't tell you is there is a second part of the equation - a part that few know and THE part that will make all of the difference.
It's about overcoming internal blockers - little guys in the brain that say "you can't do this" or the creation of pictures that stop you before you even start.
Why? Because that’s how we’re wired.
I talk a lot about our lack of evolution since “tribal times” but the reality is, neo-cortically we're basically still the same creatures. We are still tied to the same mental constraints we were when we still relied on each other for survival.
But...here’s the thing about then vs now - tribal communities were founded on just that - community - very socialistic - interest of the group over the interest of self.
I think you can see the problem here... We don't live in communities anymore! I don't need my neighbor to sustain my life - we've evolved our ability to sustain as individuals... You know what hasn't evolved? Your brain - you're still tied to your social brain of yesteryear.
To be clear, there was a very very good reason for this hardwiring when it happened - change in primitive times was a terrifying concept and almost certainly meant danger - change = danger, danger = bad.
Over time conditioning has taught us this. New is bad…
Fast forward back to now and this new goal you set is no longer about the problem in front of you, rather it’s about undoing 10k years of social conditioning PLUS the problem in front of you. If losing weight were about just losing weight, you think anyone would struggle? No - the equation is simple - eat quality, non processed food and exercise. BUT if you add in our predisposition to hating change…
Okay - so how do we overcome this. Fortunately, the answer is as simple as the problem.
Shine a light.
What does that mean? It means shine a light so bright on the bs of the problem that you are forced to see the flaws of your ways.
Let’s work through the weight example, I know a ton of you reading this would like to lose a few extra pounds - but you don’t lose the weight... do you?
Stop. Think about this. Think about working out - what is the first picture you create? I’ll bet you it’s a picture of pain. Pain and suffering, one of difficulty.
HERE IS THE LIGHT: THE FIRST PICTURE YOU CREATE IS ONE OF PAST FAILURE.
Because you don’t know ANYTHING else. You can’t have a picture of past success - because you haven't had past success! Following?
Let's fix that - I want to now take you through a quick visualization exercise. I promise it will be easy and natural and you won't' even have to close your eyes!
3 Steps to success: Create your anchor, destroy the old and finally solidify the new.
Step 1. Create the ideal picture: we're using the example of losing weight - but yours could be anything (running a marathon, etc.) The first part of our exercise takes you to the completion of your goal - the very last thing you would see once you've successfully reached your goal, in our example, we will use a friend you haven't seen in some time telling you how amazing you look! Stop, picture that exact scenario - go into the future and hear a friend you haven't seen in some time tell you how amazing you look. Really go there, now. See what you would see, hear their voice, feel how good it finally feels. Got it. Now take that movie of your friend and make it louder, make it clearer, make it bigger - this intensifies the feeling. Once you notice you're starting to grin it's time for step 2.
Step 2. Create an anchor: Pick a spot that you infrequently touch, eg: your upper ear, the back of your hand, etc. and the moment you feel that grin touch that spot - just a little pressure, don't hurt yourself but make sure you feel it.
Step 3. Break State: Remember your first phone number? Me too, easy right? But can you see it backward? Try and make it all the way through it backward.
Repeat this 3x before moving on, don't be lazy it only takes a moment and it feels good!
You've just set your first anchor, congratulations - now at any time you want to feel that feeling you just have to touch that spot and it will come back to you - pretty cool right?
Now let's destroy that old picture, remember - the one that made you feel bad, before?
Bring back that old image now - bring up the picture and fill your mental screen with it. Now, very small (postage stamp size), bring your movie of your friend into the lower left of your picture. On the count of 3, I want you to take that movie, pull it back and snap it directly toward your face - as you do this replace the old picture with the new movie of your friend. Last thing - when you pull back and let go - make an audible sound as the movie becomes big and replaces the old image. ZOOM! WOOSH! Whatever you like.
Ready - 3... 2... 1... POW!
You should now see your movie, full screen.
Now go back and try to bring up your old image, bring in your movie again and do the same slingshot. 3, 2, 1... BOOM!
Now I want you to, over the next 5 days - do this every single day.
Try and bring back your old image, the first image you thought of when you first thought of your goal and replace it with your new movie.
Every day - for 5 days. It will only take a minute.
PS - remember your anchor you set? Next time you don't feel like things are going your way... put some pressure on that spot and see what happens!